I’m Pretty Sure PUDDLE OF MUDD’s New Song Is About Getting Out Of Jail & Butt Stuff

Puddle Of Mudd is back and boy I wish they weren’t. At least not with this song.

Puddle Of Mudd is now streaming their new single “Beautimous” which I’m pretty sure is about butt sex and getting out of prison. I don’t even know where to start with these lyrics because oh my god, they’re all awful. For reference, please enjoy the entirety of the first verse below and try not to throw up.

“You are my beautiful little disaster
C’mon, little baby
I love it when you show up naked
Shaking at the front door
‘Cause I’m your back-door, trap-door man
Baby, let me in
So we can get down to some sinning
Tongue-tie me to the floor
Baby, I wanna be your little whore”

Poetry! The whole “getting out of jail” bit comes in the second verse, which starts with “Break out thе toy box, baby, I’m out of the slammer / I’m ready to play in the sand” and features such tear-jerking lines as “You know I’m digging in-betweenie / You know we’re going to sha-sha-sha-sha-shazaam.” I think part of the creep factor here too is hearing this song alongside seeing the below (AI-generated piece of absolute garbage) artwork.

Also, I’m still skeeved out by that first line about a woman showing up naked to someone’s door shaking and the first thing this guy thinks is “butt sex.” Just… dude, come on.

Anyway, Puddle Of Mudd. New album Kiss The Machine on May 2. Do whatever you want with that information here.